The Lies you Tell!!!!!!

Ok let’s get to it... I’m calling out everyone who said delivery was easy and beautiful. But you if were or are one of the ones who did have an easy and beautiful delivery keep going or read just for fun this doesn’t apply to you.  For the rest of us that it hurt, it was messy, and you felt like you could snap every man’s neck let’s go!!

  Delivery is wonderful and you will feel beautiful.

Yes! it is, when you have an epidural and it kicks in on time. You don’t feel a thing. Being numb from the waist down is BEAUTIFUL.  You feel pressure and you listen to the doctor and nurse instructions. Push when they tell you and then your little bundle comes out.  Now let me tell you I am all for skin to skin with your baby.  But I am for it after he has been washed off and cleaned.  We both can’t be dirty and nasty. I could only handle one of us being like. Let’s be honest you can’t do anything about yourself right then, so you deal with it.  But the little fella we could wait until he was wiped off.

Contraction will put you on the floor, I went from couldn’t get a thought together to answer the nurse questions. To calling my best friend and let her know I was in labor after the epidural kicked in. Took a nap and woke up when they came in to check my progress.  My first baby was a breeze!!! Went in at 7am and he was out by 9:42 am. I was happy my son was out and healthy. It was easy and beautiful and then the second one came along.

My second baby is the one who showed me all the lies I bought into.

         No, I didn’t find the beauty in it. I was ready for the tenant to be evicted. I needed him out. I had an epidural but this time it didn’t kick in until after I gave birth. So felt everything and I do mean everything. That kind of pain had me trying to put myself in positions that I hadn’t done without the help of his father! Ok, and even then I was looking at his dad like Hun I did not stretch before you started trying to do all these positions. Anyway, I was willing to try anything to get through the contractions. My mother tried her best to rub my back and hold my hand but she quickly abandoned those ideas after one good squeeze. After that all she offered what to keep the family updated on the phone and pray.

 Oh My Lord Jesus it’s a Fire.

The ring of fire is just that!!! A RING OF FIRE!!!!!! It felt like someone had set a blow torch up my hooha and turned that sucker on high.  For those who don’t know what am talking about this the point where you full term baby’s head is pushing through. They call it crowning. Well ride on King Jesus ride on!!, cause nothing was stopping my son at this point he was coming. Yes, this the moment where my child decided to come out sunny side up, looking everyone like “yes am I here and I am hungry, where is my momma.” Also for those who don’t know what that means that is when your baby comes out facing up instead of down. It’s one of the hardest ways to birth a baby naturally. Not to mention that the nurse had to catch him because the doctor hadn’t made it into the room. My Mother and Aunt watched and offered the only help they could and that was prayer.

  After Birth Care

No one talked about how much it hurt after you have the baby. All you hear about is the glow you get during pregnancy and the overwhelming love you feel the first time you see your baby.  How about someone say its possible you will have hemorrhoid’s from all the hard pushing you did. Or that fact that you are walking around feeling like your booty is falling out. And you can only sit on one cheek or a donut cause you can’t sit straight down.  Tell me about the ice pack pad along with an heavy duty over night pad you will have to wear because you will be bleeding on top of it. Let’s talk about the fact that tucks and numbing pads or spray become your best friend when you have use the bathroom or clean yourself.

Shifting back into position.

Lets not forget that all your organs which have been squished and pushed to sides up and down are now going back to their normal places. Not mention your skin and bones are moving as well. Let me just say IT HURTS!!!!!!!!! In that moment it didn’t feel wonderful or amazing.  Then the nurse is coming in every hour on the hour while trying to sleep. To give medications, check on the baby or take the baby for testing, and to press on your stomach to make sure its still soft and returning back to normal.

 Soap and Water please!

Oh but baby that first shower you get take that night or the next day when your able to stand. The feel of soap and hot water washing away all the sweat, tears and blood that you have shed. Is one of the best feelings ever.  It was the moment after that I could appreciate my little one because I felt somewhat like myself.  Clean and fresh, walking bent over very slowly, and then sitting down VERY gently it was great. I was actually able to be amazed and in awe of the little human we have had created.

I Stand Amazed! We ROCK!

Don’t get me wrong the fact we as woman can even go through this process is amazing. The fact that we were created and built to create, carry and give life to another human begin is an wonderful gift and honor. It is one of the many facts that gets proven over and over that WOMEN are AWESOME!!  And no matter what society tries to push or make people believe ONLY A WOMEN can do it.

Being a woman is not a job for the weak hearted or weak stomached.

So please don’t think that I am discouraging anyone from having children. I am doing the opposite actually I giving you the whole picture so when you decide to have one or more you have a clear understanding of how it could go during and after pregnancy and delivery, to get that perfect little angel/monster(joking) into this world.

Back to it then..   Hormones are scary

Your hormones before, during and after will have you looking at yourself in mirror asking “Do I know You!?” Honey when I tell you I would go from being happy to wanting to cry because I couldn’t find the right spatula to cook with. The struggle was real. Your hormones are another thing that’s has to return back to normal or at least whatever you call normal.  Cause mine had me feeling like if I looked in the mirror I would have Don King hair, mismatch baggy clothes, and no clue what day it was. Honestly, I know had days that I looked like that.

To the mom or parents who are wanting children and unable to. I pray you get your rainbow baby. It can’t be easy to watch friends and family experience something that you want and deserve. I am sure that you would be great parents, mom or dad.

To the ones who opted to adopted and be foster parents thank you. Thank you for opening your home and hearts to children who may have felt thrown away, disappointed, unloved, and lonely. Thank you for showing that they are loved, appreciated, important, smart and have a bright future.

Song: I Need a Hero by Bonnie Tyler